TOUR DE TOUR TO CIREBON

My stomach was full by now and was trying to get some sleep...eating various Cirebon traditional food and seafood from morning to evening, breakfast to dinner with excellent host, lol. I finally got the real taste of Nasi Jamblang. It's the local or traditional food of Cirebon, a small city of West Java. The rice was contained in 'daun jati' and we were free to choose its accompany such as 'rajungan', egg, tahu tempe, jerohan,perkedel, etc. Too bad the rice was not warm but i still had great appetite for it. For lunch, i ate fried gurame-landwater fish, and soup... Dinner with delicious shrimps and crabs... I think i ate more than i should... I felt myself heavier and fattier, lol. The culiner tour was great but the landscape and view of Cirebon was not so appealing. I was lucky it's cloudy these last two days so the heat was not there... My colleague said if it were sunny, the weather would turn so dry and hot at Cirebon... Tomorrow we will be heading home to Jakarta by train... With more boxes and snacks to carry...still have to wrap the moci we order today... And with less money left in my pocket, lol. In short, i enjoy the de tour...been blessed with wonderful collegues and friends...with one funny odd story to tell, lol... Now must get some sleep!

MARYAMAH KARPOV

Sebenarnya telah menyelesaikan buku ini beberapa waktu lalu...cuma lagi kebelit rasa malas nulis yang luar biasa :-( So far, dari keempat buku Andrea, Laskar Pelangi tetap the best baik dalam pemilihan diksi, gaya bahasa dan penceritaan, terutama isinya... kepolosan anak-anak Belitung di tengah keterbatasan sosial ekonomi.

Dalam Maryamah, kebanyakan dibahas soal adat dan budaya masing-masing suku di Belitung mulai suku Sawang, melayu, hokkian, dsb, utamanya kebiasaan taruhan... setiap suku bertaruh akan keberhasiilan Ikal membuat perahu, membawa kembali gadis impiannya pulang, atau hal-hal sepele lainnya...semuanya tetap dikemas dengan gaya bahasa sehari-hari yang terkadang bikin kita ketawa geli. Ini merupakan salah satu kelebihan Andrea dalam bercerita...bahasanya mengalir lancar, renyah dan gurih...kayak kacang goreng kali yak :-).

Fokus dari buku terakhir tetralogi ini adalah pencarian Ikal terhadap cinta sejatinya...A Ling...Petualangan Ikal menemukan cinta sejatinya...kesannya romantis tetapi dasar Adrea...kadang romantis-nya is a little bit too much... Sampai-sampai Ikal musti bikin bahtera nuh guna melayari selat Malaka untuk menjemput si Aling...tapi sekali lagi itu dimaksudkan bahwa anything is possible if we dare to dream... Dalam proses pencarian ini Ikal kembali dibantu oleh kemunculan anggota Laskar Pelangi, Lintang, Mahar, Sahara, A Kiong, Syahdan, Samson, dll. Tetapi ada yang aneh, di buku kedua, A Kiong telah menikah dengan Sahara dan menjadi muallaf, Mahar menjadi anggota dewan kesenian daerah...Nah, di sini, Mahar masih saja lontang lantung dengan Societed De Limpai-nya dengan Flo...A Kiong sebagai pembantu setiany??? Bagian ini yang aku masih bingung. Sementara Lintang is back dengan segala kejeniusannya. Di Buku sebelumnya Ikal ketemu Lintang sebagai kuli di sebuah kapal...nah di sini Lintang telah menjadi juragan kopra yang punya anak buah dan hidupnya lebih dari berkecupan dengan keluarganya. Sementara Ikal yang telah menyelesaikan S-2 di Sobonne tetap aja menjadi pengangguran lontang lantung pencari cinta..haiyah...

Sampai pertengahan buku, masih terus bertanya kenapa judulnya Maryamah Karpov???Kupikir mungkin itu nama gadis Rusia yang bakal mengisi relung hati Ikal...eh, ternyata itu merupakan nama dari Mpok Maryamah yang punya warung kopi di mana banyak orang bermacam suku nongkrong, ngobrol ngalor ngidul, sambil belajar catur ala Karpov...haiyah...tertipu...kupikir!!!


Pada akhirnya, harus bilang buku ini quite menghibur meskipun banyak keanehan-keanehan yang kadang bikin dahi ini berkerat kerut tak keruan...saking banyaknya gaya bahasa hiperbolik di sini..sayangnya keindahan isi dan gaya penceritaan tidak sekaya novel pertamanya...I still love Laskar Pelangi the best!

BAD DAY: FLOODING AGAIN

Today, waking up in the middle of the night only to see the hard raining on my rooftop...could not get much sleep after the night praying...hoping the rain would cease soon...approaching Fajr prayer, the water had risen up... a few centimeters away from my floor...well, I had to cancel my plan for taking a bath, lol...too cold and the water kept rising up. It's almost a knee height in front of my house.

The funny thing was when i called my brother, there was not raining at all in his area...some parts of Jakarta was also quite sunny,lol. I guesses i was the only one stuck in the rain. As my husband was still out side the city, i had to rely on myself this time...ready to evacuate things when the weather got worse...i prayed it did not...I hated to skip work (as much as it bored me) because my working leave woul be cut off, lol.

So, i was watching on guard. Luckily, the rain stopped at 7 a.m. The water subsided and by now it was all clear. But it's still heavily cloudy here...sometimes, the sun appeared shyly then disappeared again...i guess, it will be raining again by afternoon...i hope not as hard as last night...

But considering all that happened in Gaza, i still feel so much lucky. At least, it's only water and flood...not acid bombs or mortar shells...

I watched the news on my local TV (one of our local TV constantly aired Al Jazeera News alive), the postponed evacuation was now being on process. Many death bodies were found, some already in a state of decaying...more evidence that the Israeli army used chemical weapons...but they kept denying...are they too stupid or too arrogant??? Againts all those clear evidence???

If the victims of the holocust victims were alive to see what their leaders had done to the Palestinians, i thought they would not stand to see it either. Opression and repression would only make one nation stonger and unbreakable...as long as there was injustice, a rebel ...a fight to maintain justice will never die. History has given its lessons...but sometimes human are too pride of themselves...

CLOSING THE BORDER IS AN ACT OF A TRAITOR

Following the step of Venezuela's president, hugo Chavez, Evo Morales, the president of Bolivia, said yesterday he was breaking off ties with Israel in protest against its war in Gaza, which has left more than 1,000 Palestinians dead.It seems the latin American countries have proved themselves to be a few nations that remain uneffected by the world power. They have built strong allies and economic foundation so that their countries are not depended largely of US and its allies... way to go...

This is also added another slap to the face of the middle east countries who supported in silence of Israel attack...while they remained debating, arguing over thousands of biased considerations, Palestinian civilizians mostly women and children were killed every hour within the attack. They cried out aloud "Where are our arab brothers and sisters? Why do they turn their back on us?" A sad pleading that is still echoed ...

Middle east ulama had issued a 'fatwa', a decree stating that those who close the borders to stop Gazan residents fleeing from the massacre was truly performing an act of a traitor. I pray that this fatwa could evoke more support for the opening up of the border.

Reports told by the feeling refugees of Rusian-Palestinian descendants said that they could not cross the borders of Rafah because the military would shoot them. They could flee after the Rusia sent an evacuation plane to get her citizens out of the besieged Gaza.

What is worse than an act of treachery over our brothers and sisters???

I'LL SEE YOU IN HEAVEN!

I’ve heard another blast…the sound F-16 jet fighter flew low over my home, an already damaged 5-story apartment. Another shelling raked the ground massively, creating black smoke emanating from below. It dropped scores of fragments and spread suffocating smoke. If it were black, there was little worry. What I feared was the white deadly phosperous bombs being launched. I could not imagine my Salwa and Yekia got infected by such horrific weapon. When it touched your skin mixed with the oxygen, you would suffer a horrific burnt. It could burn away human flesh to the bone. That’s what I’ve seen on the 12^th day of our incursion… I saw that horror in front of my eyes. Nader’s flesh melted like a rubber heated in fire. There was an unspeakable agony in his drooping eyes…the way he looked at me. With his last breath he screamed “seal the door and get away from the white smoke…”. My two children were now twitching, jerking, and trembling in my arms. We were all huddled in the corner of kitchen, trying to stay away as far as possible from the door and window. I looked them in the eyes. A spasm of pain electrocuted my heart. What a mother could do in such desperate time to save her children? I felt helpless. There was no place safe in Gaza. We could not get out because all borders were closed. We just waited to die inside either from the attack or for the hunger. No humanity heard our voice. My tears had dried out. My heart was numb with pain. It died away alongside with humanity. I held them close and recited some divine verses to their ears. Our life was now in the mercy of Allah. I whispered softly …”don’t worry children, we’re going to be all right…close your eyes and ignored the rest.” I kissed them over and over again…”I’ll see you in heaven, children!”

***

“Marry, put off the cigarette, please! It’s not safe under air shelling and bombings like this!”

“Oh, damn it, George! Mind your own business. This smoke makes me relax under pressures like this. It’s not my cigarette you should worry about. It’s those F-16 shits up there! You know what, I should have been relaxing my muscles in sauna with David in London by now. But look! Here I am now, down in the death alleys, risking my damn life for these poor. Because no one gives a shit. Neither the White House nor the Saudi!”

George laughed at the cynical remark thrown by his colleague. Somehow, underneath her sarcastic words, he could sense her tender heart. Marry Sue Anderson had flew from London to join the Red Cross to Gaza. The city was besieged and incurred for more than two weeks. Only God knew for how long the bombardments would stop. Many civilians, mostly mothers and children, died. It was a huge massacre field. No one could get in, no one could get out. It was a despairing situation.

“Jesus, Christ! Are they idiot? They’re trying to hit us! Watch out George! Turn left!” Marry screamed frantically when a blast of fire directed to their ambulance. George speedily managed to escape the hit but consequently the missile hit the Red Cross Truck behind them. A huge explosion and a huge vacuum was generated that sent shockwaves through the surrounding structures. The truck blazed in scorching fire.

“F***! Jesus, help us! Malik, Aziz!” George ran to the glaring truck, trying to find any signs of life. The heat forbad him to come closer. Marry was still in a shock. Her forehead bled from the broken window shield. She struggled to maintain her balance when she hopped to the ground.

“Do they make it?” She asked bitterly, realizing no one could survive such blaze. Thick black smoke rose over around the crime scene. The hum of F-16 still heard buzzing around the vicinity. Shellings from the artillery sent massive bedlam.

“They’re alive! George cried in amazement. He hurried to two figures emerging behind the fire. Their shape was not good but they managed to walk slowly. One man suspended another’s weight on his shoulder.

“Malik severely wounded on his legs! We need help here, Marry!” George commanded. He put Malik on the ground carefully and examined his legs.

“I’ll be all right! There’s been shelling and bombings in the Zeitun neihgbourhood. You should rescue the wounded!” Malik said in a grave voice. Blood covered his shirt and trousers.

“Non sense! We will not leave you here! Look at your legs! They’re awful. They need immediate care!”Marry reasoned. She helped George making the first aid.

“Insyallah, God’s willing, I’ll be fine! More people need your help out there! No one heard their screams but us! Please, friends, leave me here. Pick me up when you’re on your way! May Allah bless you.

“Aziz?” Geoge asked.

“I say we have to continue! May Allah be with you, brother? We will return to pick you up.” Aziz kissed him on the forehead, squeezing his palms and left.

Reluctantly, the three left Malik on the safe spot near the area. His severely smashed legs had been given first aid help. They continued their trip towards Zeitoun to search for some survivors.

***

“Yekia, where are you? It’s dark here, I could not see you!”

“Just stay where you are Salwa. I’ll be downright over there soon! Whatever you do, don’t move until I told you so!” Yekia shouted to his sister. He was trying to explore his shattered apartment to find his mother, the only family he saw alive a few hours ago. He crawled carefully under the fallen debris and fire to get out from his room. He could smell flesh burnt and blood. His move was hampered by dead bodies. Some of them were his friends; face burnt down and dried blood everywhere. Some, he could not recognize. They died together in one room, huddled like fisheries dried in the scorching sun. There were eight or ten bodies he could count. He felt immediate nausea. He vomited for minutes. Terror reigned over him before he could hear his mother saying “Be strong for your sister, Yekia. Find the way out!” He looked around; saw no one but dead corpses. A few meters away, he could see the light. The dim sunlight had pierced through the rubble. He approached the light and saw there was a small leakage in the wall. He saw his escape from the collapsed building.

He hurriedly crawled back to where he left his little sister. She still crouched motionless under the kitchen table. Both hands covered her small dusty face, and her head brooded on her knees. She was crying.

“Come, Salwa. I’ve found the way out! We must get out before they hit the building again!” Yekia touched her shoulder gently and held her face on his palms. “Don’t be afraid, I’ll protect you with my life. Come now, follow me!” He grabbed her shoulder when he heard her screaming.

“Are you hurt?” He examined his sister carefully. It shocked him to find an open wound at her right shoulder. He smell blood. Sharp debris had smashed through it. Immediately, he torn his shirt and made a bandage around the wound. Salwa bite her lips to avoid another scream. She knew it would upset her brother.

“Come now, follow me. Just look ahead! No matter what you see, keep on going!”

“Where is mother? We can’t leave her?” Salwa said worrying her mother.

Yekia froze for a moment. How could she tell her that their beloved mother had died? On his first attempt to find his mother, he found her mother soaking in blood near the front door. Her body was maimed and wounded severely by the blast and fire. Her hair and flesh got severely burnt. He could not stand the horror he saw. He could not hug her…not even touch her… not in such terrible condition. He cried loudly and almost lost his mind. He wailed in agony and despair. The fire did not touch her smooth hands. He could see she was carrying three tomatoes and some slices of bread in one small bag. Slowly, he took the bag and tried to find some available rugs to cover her shattered body. It was a horror for him.

“Don’t worry about her, Sis! We’ll be seeing her in heaven. Allah is with her now.” He moved forward as he dried his tears away. The two carefully crawled toward the light.

***

“Allahuakbar, George I found one survivor here!” Digging through the debris, Aziz screamed to his colleague. He pulled a teenage out of the rumble. He bled severely from his wounds. His eyes closed as he was saying “thirsty”. Marry run to help. Her body covered in dirt and blood. He gave mineral water to the boy.

“Drink, slowly! That’s good. You’re gonna be Ok.” She examined his wounds carefully and provided the first aid help.

“He got internal bleeding on his chest, broken ribs, and bruises all over.” She said bitterly. “Aziz put him on the ambulance. I think there are still a few spaces to accommodate him.

Marry sighed heavily looking around her. Her spirit was broken by the massive agony she eye witnessed. Her legs felt so weak. She dropped to the ground and sobbed heavily. She could still see heavy aerial bombardment continued and heard fierce gunfire as Israeli ground troops moved into the more dense-populated areas of the strip. Zeitoun, where she and her team were assigned now, was only one neighboring of Gaza City. The Red Cross personnel were denied access by the Israeli army to the area for four days after the houses were shelled. By the time her team got permission, the army told them to leave the ambulances around two kilometers from the houses. The houses they passed had Israeli soldiers standing on the roofs, ready to fire even when the target was a civilian. She saw death bodies under the debris, on the streets lying unattended. She witnessed infants lied in agony at their mothers’ death bodies, crying for help. Not even a heart of the Israeli soldiers stirred by the sight. They just watched them to die. Already, two teenage, one elderly, and two children miraculously saved under the shattered buildings.

“How could they let them die like that?” Marry whispered. Tears were still glistening on her blue eyes. “How could they prevent us from evacuating the deaths and rescuing the survivors? How could they see children laying weakly, waiting to die besides their mothers’ dead bodies? Is it the world we live in now?”

“It is a sad reality. It’s the crazy wars.” George shrugged his shoulders in confusion. He sat down near her, trying to console her broken spirit.

“F***, the war! It’s children dying here! I don’t care about Hamas or Israel! This is just wrong. Children cannot live this way under constant fear and hatred. I am not a religious person. But I know deep down God… any God… Islam, Christian, Buddhist, Hindu, or Jewish will not command His followers to kill innocents brutally. Look around… it’s a huge killing field!” Marry burst in anger. Her fists clenched and her breathing was heavy. “What is the use of this stupid war? What has the world had done? Are they not human?”

“Shhhsssss… Get hold of yourself Marry! It’s no use…the best thing we can do is saving lives as much as we are capable of. Don’t put another burden on your shoulder!” George cuddled her in his arms like a father soothing his upset daughter. He wiped the tears away and put her face on his palms. “Be brave! There’s still much work, we have not all day. By dawn, we must go back to Al-Wafa Hospital.

They moved sweeping from one house to another…looking for any survivors. They urged each other to avoid main roads outside the city, and to look carefully where they drove. "Try not to pass a police station even if it was already bombed. Do not pass by a place the Israeli army has threatened to bomb. Avoid passing close to a mosque. Otherwise, you’ll kill in vain." The three had worked round the clock. So far, there was not much they could do except evacuating the most possible survivors to be saved…leaving the rest who had slight hope. They could hear screaming and crying underneath the rubble and debris, but with limited resources, equipment, and facility, they could not dig any further. Not to mention, the Israeli still launched their air aids with their warplanes and heavy artilleries. Hardly any place in the whole Strip has been spared shelling and air strikes. Some areas seemed to have been hit simply because a Hamas policeman walked nearby, or some militants were detected at a street corner by the Israeli forces. The high-explosive attack that follows could be devastating, taking out not only targeted people but a house or some passers-by. The three had to be very careful in any movement they made. Their three ambulances now only left two. They were not enough to evacuate all victims.

Approaching dawn, George made a signal to return to their post immediately. Aziz pulled one last child from the debris. He was too weak to speak. Hunger had weakened him. May be he’s been underneath that debris for more than two days without food or water. Death bodies were all around him.

“How is he?” Marry asked.

“He lost his whole family. He’s the only one left alive. His mother protected him in her arms so that the boy survived. Only some minor bruises and scars. He’s just too hunger and dehydrated.” Aziz said.

“What’s his name?”

“Amir.”

“Well…Amir, we will take care you now. You will eat soon. Aziz, I’ll carry this boy.” With one swing, the boy landed on her embrace. His eyes blinked but they dropped afterwards. Marry could sense his fear and confusion. She caressed his damp black hair and kissed him on the forehead.

“Guys, let’s go! Time is up!” George yelled from a far.

***

“Yekia, where are we going? I’m scared.” Salwa tugged Yekia’s hands in fear.

“Far away from the building… it’s not safe there. Here, we get some rest under that shelter.” He led his sister to a small house that still stood nearby. He took a slice of bread and one tomato from the small bag…”Eat”, he said.

“Are we going to heaven to meet mother?” She asked while chewing her bread lavishly. “Perhaps, Father, Grandpa, Grandma await us there too.” Her bright eyes looked up to meet Yekia’s.

“Is heaven a safe place to stay? I always have nightmares when I sleep. I fear our house will be hit and we all died. The hum of planes and the gunfire always wake me in the night. I hate it.”

“Mother said it’s a better place for us. We will not feel fear and pain in there. There’s only joys and happiness. There is not warplanes and gunfire.” Yekia said in a whisper. He put his arms around her. His mind travelled far away from his body. He saw his old days living with their parents in small apartment block. Fear was their constant company. He saw a man shot to death when he went to school…blood dipping heavily from his shattered head. He saw his father dragged on the street and beaten to death like animal. He suffered hunger and thirst when the warplanes attacked the city. He saw many awful things in his life. He would do anything to erase those painful memories from his head.

“Then, I want to go to heaven soon! I can play without fear. I can eat anything I want.” She smiled sheepishly. A red color had reached her cheek. The food had given her strength. Yekia ate the leftover bread and one rotten tomato. They tasted awful but he had to eat.

“Come, Salwa! We must get going!” Yekia stood her up and led the way. They walked for hours passing the ruins of houses. They met Israeli soldiers on their way but they seemed ignore them at all. Some terrorized them by pointing their guns at them before an order was thundered aloud.

“Leave the two alone. We have enough troubles with civilians’ causalities. No need to add one stupid additional rasp action. They will not make it anyway”

They left them alone in the street. Yekia was thankful because they let them go. He was so worried about his sister’s health. Her wound needed immediate care. The bandage was now dripped with blood, and she’s getting weaker by the hour. He feared she would lose more blood before he could reach the hospital. The hospital was the only object on his mind now. He had to bring his sister there.

“Yekia, my shoulder burnt! It hurt!” Salwa screamed in agony. Her eyes were wide open and her face went white. Yekia caught her before she collapsed. Her body was burning hot on his back. “Hang it there, Salwa! We will make it! Allah, help me!”

***

“I have no regret coming here!” Marry whispered.

“I know you won’t! You have such gentle heart underneath. You will not be able to desert these people even if a gun was pointed at your head!” George smiled. He admired her for her courage and tenderness.

“Is Aziz Ok, back there?”

“Yeah, just call him over the cell. Malik slept. It seemed the drug had already its effect on him. Poor Malik, his legs must be amputated to save his life.” George said in deep concern. His smile disappeared and replaced by sorrow. “We will reach Al- Wafa by dawn!”

“I’ve heard they hit another Red Cross truck, killing its drivers. Two press members were shot to death. The war is going crazy. They have no respect for international laws at all.” Marry shrieked in anger.

“There is no law in war, Marry. We have seen it. It’s just non sense. Sadly, no one could drag these war crimes into trial. It’s all politically bullshit! Marry saw his eyes glared with hidden anger. She held put her hands on his free hand.

A cell phone rang.

“Aziz, what’s wrong?” She called

“Another airaid! They keep dropping shells and shrapnel. The ambulance cannot stand another blast. May Allah help us all…Just be careful!” The phone was hung up. Within minutes they heard jet fighters flew low and dropping more bombs over Gaza strip.

“I hope this time they see the Red Cross mark on the ambulance.” George mumbled in an audible voice, trying hard to focus his driving to avoid uninvited attack.

“Look at that white smoke emanating from the attack. Jesus…they blew the city with white phosperous shells.” Marry shook her head in disbelief. “George, we must move fast! I think they don’t care at all whether we were humanitarian workers or just civilians!”

“You’re right! Inform Aziz to move fast too.” George commanded. “What the heck….? Why Aziz stop?”

“Pull over George!” Marry cried.

George abruptly held the brake. Both were thrown forward and hit the dashboard. Marry hurriedly ran to Aziz.

“God damn it, Aziz. You could have get us all killed! What do you think you’re doing?” Thundered marry.

“I’m so sorry. I cannot let them die!” Aziz answered. His eyes wandered far behind them. Instantly, Marry saw two black small figures from the dust. At first, she thought they were Israeli soldiers chasing their tails. As the figures got close, she could see two children were weakly walking towards them. Struck with disbelief, she run towards them but George caught her arms.

“Wait…! Israeli soldiers are close on their tails. We must not take risk!” George whispered in her ears.

“They’re just kids! I don’t care whether they shot me! I’ll go for them!” She pulled his hands away and run before George could stop her.

“Aziz, wait here!”

“We’re from the Red Cross. Just let us take the children with me. The little girl seemed in bad shape! She needed medical attention fast!” Marry yelled to the soldiers who now marched towards the scene. Slowly, she approached the two children who stood motionless in the middle. She could see the little girl was so weak…she suffered lost of blood. She lifted her in her embrace. She smell the blood and the burnt. The boy next to her was either in a good shape. He was in a shock. “George takes care of the boy!” She said.

“Are we in heaven now, Yekia?” Marry heard her soft whispering. She saw her opening her eyes for a moment, and then they were closed. Dried blood mixed with dust covered her small beautiful face. She saw her smiling gently as if she was just taking a nap. Marry gasped for breath. She never saw a face with such serenity. Her tears rolled down to her cheeks. She felt a fresh blood dripping from her hands. She looked them up and she saw a bullet hole from the little girl’s back. Red blood gushed from the wound.

“Nooooooo…….!” The boy screamed like a wounded bull. Before George could stop him, he rushed forward to meet the murderers.

TOO STUPID OR TOO BLIND

Reading the news this morning gave me so much frustration to deal with! It was said two toddlers mere left unattended at their mothers' death bodies near an israeli soldiers camp. The UN humanitarian personnels found them and said it was so sad that israel soldiers did not care at all...even they closed their eyes and did not give much time for the humanitarians to evacuate the wounded and the death. This was so unacceptable. Israeli govt did not regret attacking the UN School in Jabaliya, stating the attack as response to rocket launched from the school. The UN officer in charge had denied and confirmed there was no military activity whatsoever in the camp. Sadly, The UN top sec jend said that act was unacceptabe without giving any further condemn. the US govt just went along with israeli govt. Are they too stupid or too blind?

DEJAVU

Esmail looked at the swirling black smoke over at the Northern town of Jabaliya. Flares lit up the skies as Israeli helicopters and fighter jets flew low over the city. He could see huge flames had fully confiscated his land, his home, his heart… a land he had longed dream of… He could hear the deafening sound of bombs and artilleries resulting from the bombardments. Thes skies turned red…red as blood. He screamed aloud with choking breath “We will not die today! Our sons shall rise in great numbers!” He lifted up his fist with force. He turned away from the crowds… He changed his course … he wiped her image away. The lady in his head called aloud for him but he ignored her. His will was unbreakable now. He would not abandon his people…he looked again at her saying “I’m so sorry Grand but I have to return. Our land screams for help…this is a promise I’ve made since I was born.” Tears fogged his eyes as he run towards Gaza City…away from Rafah border.

“Grandma, I’m still going. It’s safe, I ensure you that. Ahmed will guarantee my safety.” Esmail shoveled his mini laptop into leather back bag. It’s the last gadget he brought for his work. He threw a crooked smile and stepped closer to his gradma. He put his big muscular arms around her.

“Oh, come on Your Majesty. This royal guard will only go for a few days. Soon after covering his job, he shall return at your side again. It’s just two days. I’ll be back before new year’s eve.” He kissed her softly in the forehead…trying to tease her with one little good humor.

“Esmail, I’m too old to bear another loss. Why can’t you go somewhere else? Somehere safe… You can cover story of Iranian President over the nuclear weapon…or cover up the latest news in Afganistan … going into Palestina is insane.” She pleaded. She held his face into her wrinkled hands. She looked at his grey eyes. Something caught her. They were so deep like an ocean with endless depth. They gave her peace. She could see a crescent mark on his left cheek. Time did not heal it. It was there… a token of her family history…of a robbed generation…of a robbed land. Her fingers trailed on the visible mark…it sent her fire as she touched it…tears were now rolling from her eyes.

“What’s wrong?” Esmail wiped her tears with his right hand while his left rested on her shoulder. “Grand, I have a hunch that it’s not my departure that saddens you. It’s the mark, isn’t it? And I know you would not provide me an explanation if I asked. Someday, I have to know Grand.” He spoke softly to avoid hurting her more. His grey tender eyes looked at her with concern.

“You, silly boy. It’s nothing to do with the mark. You’ve been told how you got it. How could you say that I was not sad with you leaving me all alone…what if I needed you when you were gone? Afterall I am now old and wrinkle…it affected my health!” She put an annoyed face at her grandson. She acted like a child who whined because she did not a lollipop. She pretended to get mad and threw his hands away.

“Ok Grand please don’t get mad. I take back what I said. Still, I have to go no matter what possible reasons you have. My office sends me to cover the peace talk between the two countries. It’s a challenging one for my career. Finally, they trust me to hook a big fish. I’ve bored only being assigned to cover up local news. It gives me a stepping stone. I can not throw this golden opportunity.” Esmail said with affirmative tone, trying to persuade her. “And you have sent Ahmed to come along, haven’t you?” He looked at the bulky man in front with the corner of his eyes.

“I have to go now or I’ll miss the session.” Esmail kissed her again in both cheeks and forehead. Then, he rushed to the door where Ahmeed had been waiting.

Fatima followed him close behind. Her watery eyes never left him. She knew she could not stop him. Deep down, she knew, the land would call for him…just like what she had dreamt for years since her depature. She had to let go even if it was too painful.

***

“You must leave now. Israeli is now opening the Rafah Border. You are no Palestinian. You’ll cross over easily!”

Esmail looked at her in disbelief. Never before in his life, a woman, except his grandma told him what to do in such imperative tone. Her eyes were serene black but there was no trace of fear in them. She was still busy evacuating the children from the refugee camp. She gave orders to them to follow the international humanity crews. He kept stalking at her back until she stopped.

“If you stay, you’ll get killed. That’s for sure!” She yelled.

Another blast stroke with mighty force. It hit the already shattered school. Debris and flares blown away, creating a red smoke all around. The children ran in fear, trying to avoid the collapsed building. Refugges run frantically. They had no shelter to hide from the bombardments. Esmail was thrown a few feet away from where he stood. He hit the ground with massive force. His vision blurred for a while. He smell something burnt. Then, he felt severe pain in his right shoulder. “Allahuakbar …! Esmail…!” He heard someone calling his name. The voice was distant and faint. His head ached badly. He saw the same dejavu again …now he saw memory from his past.

He saw himself in the white room. He was still so small, a five year old kid. His mother was preparing breakfast. She was tall and slender with sweet smile on her face. Her eyes were soft hazel. She wore white long dress and hearscarf. When she smiled, glossy white teeth lined artly. Her voice was soft and she smell a jasmine. Esmail remembered how beautiful his mother was. His father sat in the dining room reading newspaper. He was a few inches taller than his wife with short trimmed beard and on aval beautiful face. His eyes were raven black. His smile was almost identical with his wife, soft and sweet. Little Esmail amazed at how their parents seemed moved in harmony… like a magnet to each other…a gravity he could never explain. He saw himself kept running to and fro around them.

He saw his little home stood in a small town near Bethlehem. His home was small and simple, a typicall farmer’s house. His town was green and beautiful. Various flowers and plants grew, from cauliflower, daffodils, eggplants to wheat. His mother had tended some flowers in the front yard with great care. Some neighbors started their day with daily activities. All smiled and greeted one another. Afar, he could see the desert and the rock. It seemed a happy little town. It was his Wadi Fukin, a small agricultural town near the city of Bethlehem.

It was early morning in the kitchen. Little Esmail was still busy tying his shoelaces; his mother was cooking, and her father reading the news. There, he saw his grandparent…Abdullah, who helped him with the shoelaces. He had school to attend to. He saw no sign of his grandma, Fatima. He remembered them all vividly…their faces…their voice. It was a picture of perfect family.

Suddenly, a loud bang was heard at the door. Outside, he could hear gunshots and screamings. It got louder and louder. Some people tried to force in. Within minutes, hundreds of bullets pierced through the white door, it was shattered into pieces. They were all so overwhelmed with fear. Soldiers with green uniform and heavry weaponry forced in. There were ten soldiers in the house, many were waited outside. They pointed their guns at them. Esmail saw one of them dragged his father by force. They hit them several times with their weapons. Fresh blood dripped from his nose, mouth, ear but the beating did not stop. Abdullah and his mother screamed and tried to stop them. Instead of stopping, the soldiers continued the torture…calling them names unbearable to hear. They hit them all. Hatred filled their eyes. His families like lambs in the hands of hungry lions.

“Dogs!! You shall all burn in hell!”

“Yeah, finish them all!”

“Die, you dogs. You spoil our holy land!”

“The land is ours!”

“Don’t kill! We are only ordered to driver them out from the town!”

“F*** the order!”

Esmail heard all those spiteful words. He crouched in the corner. He wanted to make them stop; screaming at them…but his mouth was sealed. His body trembled forcefully. Tears rolled welled down from his foggy eyes. Blood was everywhere. One of the sholdiers dragged his mother approaching him. His face was like a ghastly ghost. He ripped her headscarf. A black long hair cascaded freely to her face now. The soldier was hungry…hungry for something Esmail did not understand. Her mother wrestled him with her leftover force. She screamed and yelled. Her nails buried down on the soldier’s nape. He hit her right in the face. More blood dripped from her swollen face. Two more soldiers came to her. Esmail could stand it. He ran forward to protect his mother. The rifle hit him on his left cheek. Blood soaked his little face. He kept surging forward, kicking and punching wildly. More blows came for him. His eyes now covered with blood. He heard her calling…”Run, Esmail…Faris..!”

It happened so fast. Form his corner of his eyes; he could see his father struggled loose from the soldiers. He made two of them fell to the ground with his fists. He ran towards his mother. “Get off her!” He screamed loudly. His voice roared like a wounded lion. He sprang and jerked the soldiers off his wife. The soldiers were shocked in a moment. Faris held his wife close to his chest. He run his fingers through her long black hairs, now soaked in blood.

“Aisya…Please…!” He mourned sadly…wiping the blood from her face and shaked her body as if to wake her up from a very long sleep. He kissed her over and over. Aisya lied motionless with limb body. Her clothes were torn apart. Her once serene face, was now lifeless. Esmail heard one more long shrieking voice that pierced through the very core of human soul.

“Aisya…!”

Sequence of gunshots was heard. Little Esmail heard two bodies fell on the floor. He wiped the blood from his swollen eyes. There, lying in the floor was his father and his grandfather. Bullets had scattered their flesh. His mother was lifeless not very far from him. The sight made his so sick. Nausea ambushed him. He could not look anymore…Anger and fear filled his whole existence. He hated them. He heard them laughing without remorse. He cried no more. He felt the pain no more. Hatred had taken control over his body. He sprang forward and screamed…”Murderers…” More gunshots were heard.

***

Esmail run out of breath. His head was throbbing with pain and his left shoulder burnt. The picture of his slaughtered family was vivid and clear. It was like a video rewinding in his head over and over again.

“Easy now. You’re going to be all right!”

He heard a woman whispering at his ears. He made an effort to open his eyes. The bright light hurt his eyes. With time, his eyes git accustomed to the light. He saw her sitting next to his bed. The room was white, the sheet was white. He saw some other men, women, and children lying in their beds as well. He now realized he was at the hospital. He heard children crying in pain, calling out for their parents. Their small body was on IV and bandages. Red stain was everywhere.

“You are lucky. The doctor had removed the shrapnel from your shoulder.” She smiled. “You’re at Syifa Hospital. You’ve been unconscious for a few hours.”

“I am a Palestinian!” Esmail whispered weakly, rather to himself. “They killed my family.”

“Sshhhs… everthing is going to be allright. They will transport you soon to Egypt when the Rafah Border is opened. I think you get a shock!” She stared at him with deep concern.

“I lived in Wadi Fukin! They killed them when I was six. It’s in 1980. I remembered now. “ Esmail panting for breath. His threw his gaze to the children around the ward. “I’m not crazy. Remember how I’ve been telling you about the Dejavu I have? It’s real.” He held her gaze for a moment. “I am a Palestinian, Layla! That’s why the land has called me in my dreams!”

“But how?” Layla asked, eager with the new fact of her friend. She only knew him for days but it was as if she had known him for a lifetime. She looked at his soft grey eyes. She could see recognition there, a joy and fear.

“I was shot…almost dead. No one but my grandma had faith that I could be saved. They brutally shot me.” Esmail stopped for a moment. He touched the crescent mark on his left cheek. “It was a miracle how I survived. Fatima brought me to Egypt. I survived but with no memory from the past. One bullet pierced through my brain!” He shuddered. Then, he told her about her memory recovery… the dejavu…and the shocking truth.

“I don’t know what to say! It must be painful for you to remember. It happens daily in Palestina. You have seen the horror yourself.” Layla choked for breath. She had lost her family too and she would not tell, not yet. “What will you do then?” She asked.

Esmail threw his gaze. The truth had shocked him. Yet, he was still confused. He saw Fatima on the back of his mind. He saw her sorrows and pains. She never discussed the past, never brought Palestinian issues on her life with him. Her loss was far too great to endure…arriving at home, only to see that her whole family was massacred. No alive except her only grandson. She was driven out of her homeland. The land was the heartbeat of her life, but it was denied to her. Esmail could not bear to see her get hurt again.

Yet, at Palestina, he found his peace. An empty room at his heart was now filled. The stream of Palestina flowed on his blood…its desert, its people, its city were now filling him. His land has called for him and he could not ignore the call. He had forgotten his land for almost 28 years. Now, he remembered. He saw his once beautiful land was no more than a massive prison. People were dying inside…cut off from the world by the defensive walls…treated as animals in their own land. How could he endure it?

“Esmail…” Layla called. Her soft yet strong voice had drawn him back from his deep thought. He looked at her for the first time with anew feeling. Her beautiful face shone like a bright star on the darkest night. He got lost in her for a moment.

“The children in the school? What happen to them?” Esmail remembered the children. He saw them running frantically avoiding the collapsed building. The missiles were still launched at the town.

“We have evacuated the survivors. Tens of children could not make it!” Layla said mournfully. “The hospital ran out of medication and IV. There will be a shortage of electricity, clean water, and food supplies. Either, we will die in war or in starvation.” She sighed. “You’ve seen that a lot within the last few days.”

Esmail knew she was right. He had stayed longer than he was expected. He was detained by the time Israeli launched its rockets to Gaza strip. The border was closed. He was trapped. The days of the attack had made see the truth. He saw shocking realities in Gaza. Layla worked as a member one of humanitarian aid agencies. She was his contact person in Gaza. Instead of covering stories about a truce between the two nations, he witnessed the terror of war against civilians. He saw many children died within hours, innocent robbed of their life, home, and future. Esmail saw their pain and misery…and it was now part of him.

“Ahmed has come for you. There will a three hours stop of their killing. Ahmed thinks it’s the best time to get you into Rafah border. I’ll get prepared.” Layla held his hands for minutes. Before he could say anything, she disappeared in the mass of doctors and nurses outside the ward.

***

“Esmail, don’t just stand. I need help overhere!” Layla flashed an angry look. She tried to calm a five year old kid in her hand. The shrapnel has smashed his legs badly. He screamed in pain. “Esmail…!” She shouted again.

“I’m coming!” Esmail swiftly took the kid to his broad mucular chest. He cringed when the pain on his shoulder sent him an electrical wave. But he would not yield. He saw the faces around him. They were his people. They were in pain. He was there to help. It’s his call. He has found his peace.

WHAT A RIDICULE TERMS

Israeli gave three hours cease fire for Gaza after receiving some pressures from the world. The UN is still debating and arguing without making any real progress. This is so frustrating. May be they will act after Gaza is totally annihilated. And where is the Arab League? Meanwile Egypt and French had given their proposal of cease fire to both sides. Israeli proposed Hamas' total disarmament and total stop of Hamas' missile launch as total requirement for the cease fire process. It also kept denying there's bee humanity crisis over Gaza strip. I think it's ridicilous... Children are dying outhere...starvation threatens their life...no sufficient electricity, clean water n medical supplis...are they too blind to see? If Hamas has to go for disarments, then their troops must do the same... Leaving Gaza without any defense at all is ridicilous term. This morning, it was said that the death toll has reached total 670, a quarter of it is innocent children. And Israeli continued its masacre after the three hours suspend. More will die while world leaders kept debating. This real act of terrorism will only rapidly spread seeds of hatred and retallion. Palestina will never die!

POEMS ON GAZA

Annihilation

An ocean of blood in its tidal

At the gate of annihilation

Of a nation

Of a race

Of humanity

Children cried in despair

Mothers woe in agony

Fathers mourned in misery

Earth turned crimson red

Annihilation,

Swept away in the blink of an eye

Over a nation,

Over a race

Over humanity

Annihilation,

Twilight of civilization,

A tomb on the graveyard

Of Gaza

LOOK THEM IN THE EYE

O, soldiers

You have father

You have mother

Sister and brother

And you will have son and daughter

Could you look them in the eye?

When you shoot the children?

When you color Gaza with their blood

Innocent child

Who has nothing but pure heart

Look them in eye

Before you launch the missile

And throw down your rocket

Is it bravery you seek for?

Is it victory you search for?

Is it glory to win for?

Look them in eye

And aim your gun

Look them in eye

Before you pull the trigger

For it is not bravery

It is not victory

Nor glory

CHILDREN OF TOMORROW

What was left?

In this huge killing land

But sorrows and pain

Would be there children of tomorrow?

When death besieged them

Imprisoned them with starvation,

Fear of terror and endless pain

Merciless soldiers kept an eye

A patrol of hungry vultures

A little move, paid with a bullet

A little woe, rewarded with a shot

A little despair, met with death sentence

What was left then?

Children with no future,

Who would turn anguish into hatred

A vengeance

Until the circle is full

ECLIPSE

It's been amazing how I could finish this novel within oned day... I dmired of myself, lol. I think this novel outshines its two predecessor, TWILIGHT and NEW MOON. I am a bit disappointing in NEW MOON because Bella whine.s and mopes way too lot, that i could not almost bear. It's like i lost the magic spell of Edwards and Bella. Eclipse matches Twilight in suspense, drama and magic. The characters, especially Bella improves (no more whining and moping) because the characters cope with their situation better. The suspense is much more thrilling as in this novel, the readers could see the real fight between good vampires led by Carlisle (the Cullens) side by side with Werewolves pack led by Sam and Jake against the newborn vampires led by Victoria, the emergence of Helen sent by the Volturi and the competing to win Bella's heart between Edward, the vampire, and Jake, the werewolf. The magic spell is back. Overall, Stephenie Meyer brilliantly captures true love and the meaning of sacrifice with Eclipse. It makes me unable to stop reading it until the end :-)

Synopsis of Eclipse

Edward and Bella are back together, permanently this time. After the vote made the Cullen, Carlisle had agreed to turn her into a vampire upon her highschool graduation graduation, much to Edward's dissatisfaction. He never wanted her to live a life of his.

He took a deep breath before he answered. "You could do so much better, Bella. I know that you believe I have a soul, but I'm not entirely convinced on that point, and to risk yours .. ." He shook his head slowly. "For me to allow this - to let you become what I am just so that I'll never have to lose you - is the most selfish act I can imagine. I want it more than anything, for myself . But for you, I want so much more. Giving in - it feels criminal. It's the most selfish thing I'll ever do, even if I live forever. "If there were any way for me to become human for you - no matter what the price was, I would pay it."
I sat (185)

In the end, Edward is forced to agree than seeing her so unhappy. He would change her himself only on one condition, she marries him. first . He is an old-fashioned vampire, lol. He places matrimony above than just merely trivial love and lust.

"You see, Bella, I was alwaysthat boy. In my world, I was already a man. I wasn't looking for love - no, I was far too eager to be a soldier for that; I thought of nothing but the idealized glory of the war that they were selling prospective draftees then - but if I had found . . ." He paused, cocking his head to the side. "I was going to say if I had found someone, but that won't do. If I had found you, there isn't a doubt in my mind how I would have proceeded. I was that boy, who would have - as soon as I discovered that you were what I was looking for - gotten down on one knee and endeavored to secure your hand. I would have wanted you for eternity, even when the word didn't have quite the same connotations." (187)

Later on, Bella is torn between her will to become immortal to be able to be her true love or to stay human for the sake of her family, and friends, mostly for Jake. Will she say yes and risk disappointing her family?

In the meantime, the emergence of the Cullens again in Forks has awakened the pact of werewolves at La Push reservation. Their everlasting feud had come to a verge of a fight. Jake is not giving up Bella to a vampire and Edward is much the same. Bella is much torn between Edward and Jake. She loved both but she has 'imprinted' Edward as her true soulmate. At the same time, she is not able to see Jake getting hurt. Edward gets jealous and gruesome ob Bella's affection towards Jake.

Things get worse when on the news Seattle is being ravaged by a “serial killer” that is really an army of newborn vampires that are unable to control their bloodthirsty urges. Unsolved murders have put the city into an alert. The Cullens are afraid that this incident might provoke the Volturi to interfere. If that was the case, they would soon find out that Bella was still a human (on New Moon, Alice had made them see that Bella would join The Cullens as vampire). It means danger to Bella. As Edward as his brothers investigate, Bella's home has un invited visitor. This visitor steals some of Bella's belongings...Alice thinks it is used to get Bella's scent.

It is later revealed upon Bella's graduation party, that the newborns are being created by Victoria, who has wanted Bella dead ever since the end of Twilight. Their numbers outnumber The Cullens. Carlisle tries to get help from Tanya (a family like the Cullens) but they do not answer the call for one of their family being upset with death of Laurent by the wolves. It's also interesting to find out about Alice and Jasper past in thi novel. As mentioned in other two novels, their changing as vampires were still a mystery to the Cullens. And theirs are revealed in this chapter. The mystery about how the werewolves appear also gets lighten up. The inner conflict of their existence towards the people they love is much the same with the vampires. The relationship of Sam-Emily-Leah is also quite appealing the readers...just like with Edward, Bella, and Jake.

Jake and his pact, realizing the danger towards their people if the newborns attack and Jake for Bella, decide to make a truce with the Cullens. They will be working together to protect Bella. They have to destroy these bad bloodsuckers. Edward, particularly, want them to be destroyed soon before the Volturi intervene. It is up to vampire Edward and werewolf Jacob to unite the good vampires and werewolves in order to save Bella’s life.

As they are on the same page, Edward and Jacob learn about each other deeply more than they ever think about. Jacob still has hope that Edward will be able to let her go...to stay human...to grow old...and have kids and grandchildren. Edward says again that the decision is not up to him. He has made the wrong desicion last time left her, he will not make the same mistake again.

Edward spoke slowly. "Jacob, from the second that I realized that I loved her, I knew there were only four possibilities. The first alternative, the best one for Bella, would be if she didn't feel as strongly for me - if she got over me and moved on. I would accept that, though it would never change the way I felt. You think of me as a . . . living stone - hard and cold. That's true. We are set the way we are, and it is very rare for us to experience a real change. When that happens, as when Bella entered my life, it is a permanent change. There's no going back. . . .

"The second alternative, the one I'd originally chosen, was to stay with her throughout her human life. It wasn't a good option for her, to waste her life with someone who couldn't be human with her, but it was the alternative I could most easily face. Knowing all along that, when she died, I would find a way to die, too. Sixty years, seventy years - it would seem like a very, very short time to me. . . . But then it proved much too dangerous for her to live in such close proximity with my world. It seemed like everything that could go wrong did. Or hung over us . . . waiting to go wrong. I was terrified that I wouldn't get those sixty years if I stayed near her while she was human.

"So I chose option three. Which turned out to be the worst mistake of my very long life, as you know. I chose to take myself out of her world, hoping to force her into the first alternative. It didn't work, and it very nearly killed us both.

"What do I have left but the fourth option? It's what she wants - at least, she thinks she does. I've been trying to delay her, to give her time to find a reason to change her mind, but she's very . . . stubborn. You knowthat. I'll be lucky to stretch this out a few more months. She has a horror of getting older, and her birthday is in September. . . ." (338)

"As I said, I'm feeling oddly grateful for your presence in her life tonight. It was the least I could do. . . . You know, Jacob, if it weren't for the fact that we're natural enemies and that you're also trying to steal away the reason for my existence, I might actually like you."
"Maybe . . . if you weren't a disgusting vampire who was planning to suck out the life of the girl I love . . . well, no, not even then." (339)


Finally, they both make peace with each other. Now, the moment of the war is about to start. The newborns led by victoria is appraching. Meanwhile, The Cullens also have to worry about the emergence of the Volturi. Bella is caught in the middle. She fears for the safety of The Cullens and her weerewolves' friends...will she able to see her beloved, friends and family face to face with death???


I have to give four thumps up for this novel :-) It's entertaining and not easily to forget..the suspense will take its readers out of breath...the romance is much more melting than in TWILIGHT. ...cant wait to read the fourth "DAWN BREAKING...I hope it's as good as ECLIPSE...or more perhaps :-)