NYANYI SUNYA PERAHU RENTA

Saat pertalian merenggang pasti

Laut berduka bersama badai

Menggulung perahu renta ke pusara prahara

Hilang kemudi tercabik sunyi duka

Berputar bergelung dalam belenggu bahtera

Senja pun bermuram durja

Mengusir pergi surya sore yang hendak singgah bercanda

Berlarian kecil bersama lautan biru

Saat pertalian memudar pasti

Bagaikan setitik air di atas rerumputan pagi

Laut dan pantai saling menjauh pergi

Berlarian berlawanan tujuan

Membawa luka hati

Hingga lekas menuakan usia

Seperti perahu renta yang merana

ANOTHER DAY HAS GONE

Alhamdulillah, on day 24 I have completed juz 22 and now in the end of juz 23. Time flies so fast... It's just a few days left before the most beloved darling and lover would soon be gone for another year. We had to wait another one year to meet this most precious one again if only we still had the chance.

Allâhumma bârik lanâ fî rajabin wa sya`bân, wa ballighnâ syahra ramadhân, wa a`inna `alash shiyâmi wal-qiyâmi wa hifzhil lisân wa ghadhdhil bashir, walâ taj’al hazhzhanâ minhul jû`a wal-`athasy.

(Ya Allah, berkahi kami di bulan Rajab dan Sya’ban, dan sampaikan kami ke bulan Ramadhan. Bantulah kami untuk melaksanakan puasa, melakukan shalat malam, menjaga lisan dan memelihara pandangan; dan jangan jadikan puasa kami hanya sekedar lapar dan dahaga.)”

O, Master of The Day of Requital

Save and keep us away from any evil which You have decreed

Oh Giver of refuge for those who seek refuge

I seek shelther in You from words of fitna and hate

O, Creator of heaven and earth

save and keep us away from false worng doings

O, Raiser of the fallen;Who answers the calls of the dejected

do not let us fall into the pit of fire

do not let us fall into the trap of our enemies

that spread words of lies

and cast their eyes on us with hatred and malice

O, The Most Merciful

We seek forgiveness

from any evils and crimes that we have comitted

O, Lord of all Lords

Guide us by Your favor among those whom you have guided

Keep us away from the evil of the tongue

save us from the evil of dark heart

do not our friends turn into our enemies

O, Allah all praise is due to You

Hear my prayers

and show us the way

FELL INTO A TRAP

That's what i've been feeling lately at work. Out of the blue, you've got transferred into another division with a blur reason. And the first test was to arange an impossible schedule that should be carried out within a limited span of time. Not to mention, the thoughts that the human resources and financial to perform the task were scarce...so it aroused a big question mark on my head.

Hey, but i'm just a pawn... when there's a war, it's always the pawn who got ordered to die first, lol. May be I should be a rebel, so if i was given an impossible task, i would dare to say "No". But, that's not my nature, i guess... always do as bided...do the task no matter how ridicilous it was.

Someday, i dont wanna be the pawn...i wanna be the horse, lol. Free from any reign...I need this long vacation !

RAPUH BY OPICK

I like this song very much. The lyrics and the melody is just so great. It's a great reminder on how fragile we are as humans.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pa_p1YVNh8E

RAPUH (FRAGILE)

detik waktu terus berjalan
berhias gelap dan terang
suka dan duka tangis dan tawa
tergores bagai lukisan

seribu mimpi berjuta sepi
hadir bagai teman sejati
di antara lelahnya jiwa
dalam resah dan air mata
kupersembahkan kepadaMu
yang terindah dalam hidup

meski ku rapuh dalam langkah
kadang tak setia kepadaMu
namun cinta dalam jiwa
hanyalah padaMu

maafkanlah bila hati
tak sempurna mencintaiMu
dalam dadaku harap hanya
diriMu yang bertahta

detik waktu terus berlalu
semua berakhir padaMu

MY WEEKEND

Alhamdulillah, I already finished juz 18 and now in the middle of juz 19. This weekend, I spent only at home...only go to the mosque for Taraweeh and morning pray. My health is also getting better :-). Still having a liitle bit cough but the rest is OK.

Yesterday, my husband went to his brother's home. I did not go with him as I was still tired after arriving home late. The day before, some of my friends took me out to have iftar together. It was not as good as planned as we were late in reserving tables. So, we had to wait for almost one hour and a half before we got our table...We were almost angry at each other ...blaming one another...Alhamdulillah, it ended up in better ways. We had some good laugh and conversation after a long time we havent met each other.

Last night, I woke up late. I set up my alarm at 1.45 am. I heard it rang, but still too sleepy to get up...in addition, my husband was not there so there's no need to hurry for sahur...lol. I really woke up at 2.55 am. I was a little bit upset with myself as I had previously planned to wake early for Witir pray dan Quran reading... Fortunately, I still had another one hour left to do all

And now, i had just finished the taraweeh at the mosque. As usual, during the 10 days of Ramadhan, the people who went to the mosque was getting fewer and fewer. The mosque is crowded at the beginning of Ramadhan and at the end. And as always, I will be busy preparing for 'mudik lebaran' in the last four days of Ramadhan. It is a tradition in Indonesia that people in the big cities will go back to their hometown during Idul Fitr. Consequently, millions of people are flowing to the small town and villages outside Jakarta, the city I currently live in. It creates heavy traffic jam all the way to the destinated towns, including my hometown, Solo. Actually, this year i want to spend idul fitr at Jakarta and go home afterwards. But my husband insists that we have to go home I never like being at the road at Ramadhan. It's not fun at all after almost four years doing this tradition...someday, hopefully, my office would transfer me to work in its local office at Solo so i dont have to do this tradition...and I would be closer with my parents

POEMS OF THE DAY

REFLECTION

Mountainous sins have we committed

As they grew more and more within each day

Wrapped within millions lies and false pride

Monsters who came closer and constantly

Sieged and ambushed mortals from all direction

To bury us deep in sinful ocean

A vulnerable stride

A weak soul

All mistakes were ours

All praise only for the Highest King

Within Your ocean of mercy and affection

The most Grace

The most forgiving

Whom we seek for a hope

Lord, soothe me

As tis burdens and temptations are too much to bear

Lord, comfort me,

As these illnesses have shattered the soul

Show us mercy

Show us forgiveness

Guide us in the straight path.

The path of those whom You have favoured.

Not of those who have earned Your anger and nor of those who have gone astray.

THE END

What if time has stopped?

Will you feel proud of the worldly glory and fame?
For the world is only temporary
What if it all vanished and gone?
Left you all alone

What if the time has come?
It stops without your knowledge

Will there be a way to return?
To turn back the time

To rewind the past in turn

What if the time has come?

Will you still linger in anger and hate?

Will you still able to live to loathe?

Will you still able to live to hurt?

Will you still able to live to paint sadness?

With all the conceit and pride?

http://www.free-lyrics.org
the world is adorned with many beauties

Momentary pleasures and joys
Yet, all but only a fleeting moment

If the time has come
Your only true friend is virtuous

If the time has stopped
your only true friend is stillness

Waiting for The Book of Life to open

SEVEN ADVICE OF RUMI

"In generosity and helping others be like a river.
In compassion and grace be like sun.
In concealing others’ faults be like night. In anger and fury be like dead.
In modesty and humility be like earth.
In tolerance be like a sea.
Either exist as you are or be as you look."

WHAT ARE YOU, THROUGH SONG

From Mbak Ary, it's quite fun. Describing yourself through songs.

The rule is pick your favourite artist/band. Then answer the questions only with the title of the songs. Mine is KITARO.

1. Are you male or female?
Lady of dreams

2. Describe yourself.
As the wind blows

3. What do people feel when they're around you?
Misty (kali aja ya

J )

4. How would you describe your previous relationship?
Chrystal Tears

5. Describe your current relationship.
Heavenly illusion

6. Where would you want to be now?
The Great Wall of China

7. How do you feel about love?
Sacred Journey

8. What's your life like?
Floating Lotus

9. What would you ask for if you had only one wish?

Peace

10. Say something wise.

Peace Through Kindness

A NIGHT OF A THOUSAND MONTHS

Alhamdulillah, tonight is the 17th day of Ramadhan. In Indonesia, this night is widely celebrated as Nuzulul Quran (the descending of qur'an).

Ramadhan is so special because it is not only a month when the gate of heaven is widely open, but also because it has two special days: Nuzulul Quran and Lailatul Qadar. Nuzulul Quran falls on the 17th night of Ramadhan. It is always celebrated widely in Indonesia. It is believed that the holy Quran was first granted to the great prophet Muhammad (pbuh) on the 17^th night of Ramadhan. Meanwhile, Lailatul Qadar is a night of a thousand months. Lailatul Qadr means The Night of Power, or the Night of Decree. It is a spiritual glory that is yearned by those who fast. It is a mystical sacred night which is eagerly waited for by those who fast during the month of Ramadhan.

The prophet Muhammad SAW said," The night of Laitul Qadar happens on one night of the last 10 nights of Ramadhan.” It is said that the signs of night of Lailatul Qadar are among others:

- The night is always calm, not too warm and not too cold

- The sun during the day is pale

- On the night Jibril willl greet (Salam) those who stay up during the night to perform the salat, dua or zikir and they will feel kind of sadness and will cry incessantly suddenly

Allah (Subhanahu wa Ta'ala) has explained how special Lailatul Qadr is in the Qur'an:
"Surely we have revealed the Qur'an on the Night of Al-Qadr; The Night of Al-Qadr is better than a thousand months;The Angels and the Spirit (Jibrael) Descend in it by their Lords' permission, with every decree. Peace it is, until the break of Dawn."
[Surah Al-Qadr, 97: 1-5]

Therefore, during the last ten days of Ramadhan, muslims all over the world will increase their ‘ibadah’ by staying up late to read The Holy Book, dzikir, and other ibadah. All with one longing…that is to be blessed in the night of power... to get closer to The Lord of all kings.

Malam Seribu Malam

Dalam hening malam, aku bersujud

Menghiba pinta dengan cemas

Mengharap kasih agar berbalas

Menanti kekasih agar bergegas

Dalam sunyinya malam,

larut hati dalam lantunan kalam,

bergetar jiwa dalam basuhan dzikir,

saat bisikan rembulan mengalir,

menguntai simponi dalam melodi ruhani,

bersiap menyambut tamu teristimewa,

Engkaulah bulan terelok sepanjang abad

Engkaulah kekasih ternanti jutaan hati

Engkaulah tambatan cinta paling abadi

Engkaulah pengukir janji sejati

Wajahmu rupawan tiada cela

sinarmu terang tiada noda

pesonamu menggoda setiap mata

tatapanmu syahdu laksana lukisan suarga

Dalam hening aku menanggis

Menghiba pinta dengan cemas

melantunkan alunan kalam sepenuh hati

agar bersua kesempurnaan malam tiada dua

My Flashback for Ramadhan

Time seems fly so fast like the wind of change that always sweeps the universe. It will be 16th day, insyallah today. It's so fast...almost unaware of this. It's just like yesterday, i started my first fasting of this ramadan.

It brought back the memories of my ramadhan when i was a kid. It's so much different with what i felt today. As i grew up, many changes had occured...sometimes, these changes and growing older makes me grow 'old' ( i hope wiser) :-)

Ramadhan When I was A Kid

Iftar: the food was always everything… eat as much as I could regardless the capability of my stomach, lol. If it did not fit me, I would grumble and upset ( and I’m so sorry for this especially to my mother who always cook the best for her family)

Taraweeh: I really enjoyed taraweeh because it’s time to pray together with many friends and neighbors. Always tried hard not to miss one…often too sleepy because of eating too much, lol

Sahur: the food was also essential like iftar…eat so so muuuuuch so I would not starve in the day

Reading Qur’an: rarely…never set a target…still loved to play with other kids at the neighborhood L

The beginning: I would still enjoyed fasting

The middle: I would wish that Ramadan would end soon so I could I could eat anything I wanted on any hour

The end: I was so happy because it meant I would get new clothes and more money ( the customary tradition during Idul Fitri in my village was parents and adults who already worked would give money to children as expression of their happiness in the holy day. On Idul Fitri, usually kids would get many money from each family they visited J )

New Clothes: always required new clothes from my parent…if they did not buy me one, I would cry, lol

When I Grew Old

Iftar: the food is not priority. A sip of water or sweet snacks would be sufficient as the opening. Eat in a moderate way and proportion…not too much and not too little

Taraweeh: Only able to go the mosque during weekend. On working days, I usually got home when maghrib came…preparing the iftar, washing the dishes until 9 pm. So it was mostly done at home L

Sahur: the same as with iftar

Reading Qur’an: everyday tried to recite the holy book…the target is always finishing the 30 juz in the holy month

The beginning of Ramadhan: I’d be thrilled because the holy month has arrived…the month of mercy must not be wasted

The middle: I was always amazed on how fast Ramadan flied away…wished so much that the time would turn so slowly…

New clothes: it’s no longer an obligatory …decent and proper dress would be enough J

The end: I had a feeling of sadness because the special guest had left. It meant the day would go back normal again…sometimes wished that the end was only a dream …and when I woke up, I was still in Ramadan time

In the name of Allah, The Beneficent,The Forgiver, the Merciful

Lord of all lords and kings, who has none like Him,

He is the Allhearing, the Allseeing,

It is the holy month in which fasting is an obligatory,

It is the month in which the gate of love and mercy,

Are widely open with all divine lights,

It is the sacred month in which The Holy Book sent down,

As guidance for mankind, having clear signs of guidance and distinction,

In this blessed month,

Lord of all kingdoms and heavens,

Have placed most precious night,

And made it better than a thousand months,

as blessings and merits for mankind,

Lord, Glorious One,

let not the moment slips away so fast

let not the lights of the garden dims so swift

let not the gate open too short

let not the parting comes too soon

Glorified is the Owner of the Kingdom of the earth and the heavens; Glorified is the Possessor of Honour and Magnificence and Awe, and Power and Greatness and Omnipotence
Glorified is the Sovereign, the Living, Who does neither sleep nor die
O all Glorious, All Holy one, Our lord and the Lord of the Angels, And the soul.
There is no God but You, Forgive us, Grant us Paradise, and save us from (hell) fire.

A TRAGIC INCIDENT AT PASURUAN, EAST JAVA

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pSyrW3IzXK4

It's so sad to watch the news on TV about the incident. Thousands of people were huddling and crowded...even the number were too huge compared with the space and the available facilities...to get in line for Zakat of a merely Rp.30,000 (around $3). 21 people were killed and all of them were women of 25 up to 60 years old. They were suffocating, run out of air, stumled and stepped by others. This incident had claimed highest victims so far in this country regarding zakat distributed by wealthy person personally, not through zakat legal institutions. Such incident already happened some years ago, mostly at the time approaching Idul Fitri but the casualities were not as stunning as this one. It was reported that such distribution by the wealth merchant had been carried out since 1975 and no fatal incident had occured.

May be the sum of money was little or us all but for those poor people, the number meant a lot. It meant another day to survive. It made them do anything to get it, even if they had to get in line for hours. This yearly incident should had been taken as lesson for others who wanted to distribute zakat to carefully design such allocation that safeguarded people's safety. Coordination between security personnels, medics, and other related institutions is a vital in such case. In addition, it would be wiser if the zakat is distibuted by legal institution to prevent such mass 'invasion'.

This tragedy could be also regarded as the sign the rising of poverty in this country. The skyrocketing oil pricess and the basic necessities have made some families live barely up to the poverty line. And it's always the poor who had to bear the consequences.

The word Zakat means both 'purification' and 'growth'. Our possessions are purified by setting aside a proportion for those in need, and, like the pruning of plants, this cutting back balances and encourages new growth.

Zakat is the amount of money that every adult, mentally stable, free, and financially able Muslim, male and female, has to pay to support specific categories people.

This category of people is defined in surah at-Taubah (9) verse 60: " The alms are only for the poor and the needy, and those who collect them, and those whose hearts are to be reconciled, and to free the captives and the debtors, and for the cause of Allah, and (for) the wayfarers; a duty imposed by Allah. Allah is knower, Wise." (The Holy Qur'an 9:60).

The obligatory nature of Zakat is firmly established in the Qur'an, the Sunnah (or hadith), and the consensus of the companions and the Muslim scholars. Allah states in Surah at-Taubah verses 34-35: "34:O ye who believe! there are indeed many among the priests and anchorites, who in Falsehood devour the substance of men and hinder (them) from the way of Allah. And there are those who bury gold and silver and spend it not in the way of Allah. announce unto them a most grievous penalty- 35:On the Day when heat will be produced out of that (wealth) in the fire of Hell, and with it will be branded their foreheads, their flanks, and their backs, their flanks, and their backs.- "This is the (treasure) which ye buried for yourselves: taste ye, then, the (treasures) ye buried!" (The Holy Qur'an 9:34-35

Zakat has a very wise and good goal and it is obligatory for all muslims who are able to perform the duty. Such noble goal should be conducted wisely so other no victims fall in its distribution.

Let us all take a moment to pray for all the victims. May Allah gives them ease and their soul purified in this holy month.

DENDENG PEDAS BUATAN SENDIRI

This morning, i decided to go to the traditional market to buy some fresh meat...i prefer buying meat from this market rather than from the supermarket...it's more fresher and no ice...lol.

Then, in the afternoon, I made my own recipe. It's quite good. My husband told me all the time i had not bothered to cook again as he's afraid i would get tired and sick. But, It's not right if i did not at least cook a bit for iftar. Alhamdulillah, it tasted quite ok...but still a little bit hard to bite...may be i have to fry them longer, lol.

And, I had stopped taking my medication because I felt those drugs made me weak and slept all the time...the cough is still there but it;s not that serious anymore...so i guess there's no need to continue taking the medication...

LORD, SHOW ME THE WAY

Lord, show me way

Let not my way gets astray

Into the fire pit of hell

That burn infinity

Lord, show me love

Let not me fall into becoming a hypocrite

who talks lies and slanders

who brings nothing but sufferings

who loves nothing but temporary bliss

who fears nothing but worldly degradation

Lord, show me mercy

let not me fall into the dungeon of fire

that consume my spirit alive

with revulsion and hate

Lord, Al Muhaiminu

The Protector and The Guardian,

let not me despair

let not me becoming the condemned

or the damned

In You, I rest my hope

I kneel and pray

to be saved

THE GATE OF HOPE

The Gate of Hope

Come, travellers

Of east and west,

The journey to the gate of hope has been laid opened

Whatever you are

Wherever you are

Just follow the track of the mirage

Come, travellers

Of east and west

For a believer nor disbeliever

For idolaters or worshipper

The time is near

The gate shall not wait forever

Come, travellers

Of east and west

Keep up the pace

Let it race

Into the road of love

Come travellers

Of east and west

The crescent has been sighted

The gate of mercy is widely open

To lead into the garden

Of infinity

Come, travellers

Let not weary and tarry

Let not despair beguile the spirit

Let not foolishness blindfold the mind

Let it all free

Let the heart speak free

Liberating all worldly sense

Let it lead the way

Through the gate of hope

Into the garden

TWO DAYS AT BED

Alhamdulillah, my first round of Ramadan went well. I almost did very preparation by myself (no longer with the help of a housemaid). I cooked the sahur and iftar...and mu husband loved my cooking :-). It's just so great. And I was able to finish Juz 7 and never left taraweeh although most of the time I did the pray at home.

Unfortunately, at day 10th, i lost my temper... my emotion got at its lowest. I really regreted this...Patience and endurance is still becoming an issue I have to deal with. I should have known losing control of my temper is a constant sign that my montly period would come. And yes, I did not finish the 10th day. I would be forbidden to fast maybe in the next 7 days :-(

What worse to come was I got cold and fever and coughing. My coughing was the worst I've ever experienced...It really drained my energy and my health was deterioting. So yesterday, I went to the doctor...she prescribed some medicine for cough, cold and fever. I had to skip work for two days. So Thursday up to this Friday, I stayed mostly at bed...did nothing, lol. It's really no fun at all. I could not pray, read Qur'an and fast...it's not so cool at all. I just prayed that my sickness would go away soon.

Alhamdulillah, this afternoon I feel a lot better. The fever was gone and the cold was subsided...only the cough was still there but not as bad as it used to be. So, I opened my PC and checked e-mails and other stuffs...going on MP again :-).

And now, I'm going to clean the house, wash the dishes, and take a bath...no more cooking for the time being as i still feel a little bit tired, lol.

I'll pray that my next fast would be so much better...able to hold my temper and finish all the 30 juz.