How do You Find Happiness in Life???

“Happiness does not depend on outward things, but on the way we see them”




Are you one of among millions of fans of Whitney Houston? Well…I don’t claim myself as being one though I do enjoy some of her songs. I used to listen to some of her greatest hits especially “I Will Always Love You” which I consider one of her most ultimate vocal performances of all time. She stands among few singers in music history who possesses powerful voice and has the ability to move an audience with her voice and songs. She had acquired tremendous successful career in singing as well as acting during the late 1980’s and early 1990’s. She has collected six Grammys and more than 400 other awards in her 25-year career. It’s like a Cinderella story with a happily ever after ending. She’s got beauty, talent, golden voice, fame and wealth. Many may wish for the money and fame of such pop star, thinking these things would mean a happier life. Who wouldn’t want money in today's crazy world where money is valued above all by many :-). Unfortunately, it doesn’t work that way sometimes. “Happiness does not depend on outward things, but on the way we see them”, once Leo Tolstoy had said.



Whitney Houston’s once brilliant career and life turned ugly as drugs and alcohol ravaged her. A combination of her troubled marriage to Bobby Brown, drugs, alcohol, and depression wrecked her career and life in general. On an interview with ABC’s Diane Sawyer in 2002, the diva said "The biggest devil is me. I’m either my best friend or my worst enemy". It seems that she had failed to reconcile herself with the enemy within. In the end, fame and wealth was unable to offer her happiness. The once confident and charismatic Whitney Houston waned into a sad shell. Drugs and depression had consumed her vital energy that finally claimed her life. The shocking news of Houston’s untimely death in her hotel room last Saturday at the age of 48 has taken public by surprise. She failed to battle the devil within.



Sadly, a story like Houston’s is familiar in the glamour of music industry. Chaka Khan said that “music industry is demonic.” The pressure and tension is just too much sometimes. There are countless superstars around the world including in Indonesia are in constant warring with drug and alcohol on daily basis. Many are in and out of rehab facilities. Elvis Presley died at 42 after years of drug abuse. Marilyn Monroe died at the age of 36 after an overdose of barbiturates. Kurt Cobain's drug addiction has supposedly led him to commit a suicide. Britney Spears and Lindsay Lohan are recent young artists who get entangled with drug and alcohol addiction. In Indonesia, numerous celebrities suffer similar struggle. Some are jailed for drugs abuse such as Roy Marten, Yoyo Padi, Ahmad Albar, among others. Some are battling and win like the late Gito Rollies. Some are losing and surrender their life for it like the late beautiful Alda. Why would they waste all their brilliant career and life for drugs or alcohol? are they not happy?



Well, we do not for sure what drive those people to use drugs and alcohol. Perhaps, the pressure and tension they endure that steer their erratic behaviors. Perhaps, they need them to boost more power temporarily until they get trapped and unble to break free. Some, maybe, consume the demonic subtances in an attempt to mask their fears and problems, falsely believing that the substances offer safety and security. There are many reasons and excuses to answer of the 'why' questions. But, I think we all agree on one common ground that whatever choice they take in life, they hold responsible for the consequences. We write our own destiny and no one is to blame on any consequences resulted from our own choice.


Lesson learnt from this tragic reality is no amount of fame of fortune or money could bring happiness if you are not happy inside. For example, I think I will be happy if I could get back in my old workplace to have normal working hours, less tension and stress. That's what I think the kind of thing that will make me happy. But such feeling is only temporary. If I ever obtain such position again, who could say that I would be happy and content. It's a state of mind to think that happiness will come to our way once we get what we want. The same case applies to all the buzz with promotion and mutation at work. Sometimes, you get transferred into a workplace you despise, or sometimes you don't get the promotion you are after for. Then, you start to think "Oh, God, this isn't fair", and see happiness vanish from your life. Well, cursing will not help. Sometimes, we do not always get what we want in life. We all live under the same sky, but we don’t all have the same horizon. The best thing you can do is exploit the best things of anything and be grateful on what you have... trying to see everything in their bigger picture :-)... trying to find the beautiful golden strands in every line :-)



It is the nature of men to always want more than what we already have. Once, we get what we wish for, we start to desire other things in mind to satisfy our needs. So long as we don't enjoy and feel content on the things we have, we will never be happy. True happiness can only come from inside us, when each of us decides internally that we are happy. It’s a bit cliché but it mirrors truth. Neither a single person nor a single drug could offer you real happiness when inside you are unhappy. Be grateful and content on what you have now...then we perhaps may find happiness...do our best and let God do the rest :-)



So, “Happiness does not depend on outward things, but on the way we see them” :-).

Lost Promises

Waves came crashing upon shores,


Dancing in melancholy blues,

Gently the moon laid her tender kiss,

And the stars formed a patch of silver dusts,

Brighten up the dark skies with colors,

Yet, the sea is still roaring in torment,

Casting fears over the night,





Under the shade of the full moon,

We stood in stillness,

As the ocean played its somber rhythms,

And seagull shrieked in cries,

Our tears frozen into misty pearls,

Rolling down to the watery sands,

Over our lost promises

Do You or Do You Not Celebrate Valentine's Day???

Today is Feb. 14 which is in some parts of the world, including some parts of Indonesia, is celebrated as the so called auspicious Valentine’s Day. It is a perfect time to celebrate romance, love, and kiss with candy, flowers, chocolates and other lovely gifts. Malls, restaurants, shopping centers, shops are decorated with symbols of Valentine's Day (V-Day) including roses, cupid and heart-shaped chocolates or balloons to magnetize lovers and families alike. Millions will double their spending to take their loved ones to restaurants and eateries to celebrate their joys of their togetherness with delicious cuisines on this special day or even buy precious gifts such as diamonds or any other expensive jewelry as a pledge of their fealty to their beloved. It is actually a western culture derived from ancient Rome during the era of paganism associated with feast of Lupercalia, a pagan fertility festival to its present incarnation as a commercial free-for-all driving huge sales of chocolate, flowers and jewelry. At present time, it is promoted and nurtured smartly by the greeting companies with collaboration with the candy, flower, and teddy bear companies to make more money. The ads and pop culture in movies, songs, poetry published within any digital screens are the driving force behind this continued lore. It is just the perfect conductor to nourish the idea worldwide. Everything with love and romance will always definitely catch the attention of the tender hearts. As a result, Valentine’s Day today is celebrated not only in the western countries but also in Eastern countries. Yes… it is undeniably a huge cash machine that generates billions of dollars. But do you know that the origin of St Valentine's Day, is actually dark, bloody — and a bit muddled.



http://www.npr.org/2011/02/14/133693152/the-dark-origins-of-valentines-day


http://www.telegraph.co.uk/relationships/valentines-day/7187784/History-of-Valentines-Day.html


Personally, I don’t celebrate Valentine’s Day. Nor do I have any objection or any grudge for those who celebrate it. It’s a matter of personal preference. It’s just that I don’t see any point of celebrating the day. Love is every day celebration whether it’s parental love, friendship love, or respectful love, you name any. It has nothing to do with my Faith (although, Faith has its part on me, lol). Rather, I see such festivity is just way too much, corny, and too bloody exaggerated in my point of view of eastern culture. It’s just out of place. Seeing celebrities boast of their ways in spending their V-Day in infotainments, couples present their precious gifts and throw hugs and kisses in public is just not befitting. It’s like hearing a song out of its tune, irritating and a bit annoying, lol. For young Indonesians who live in big cities like Jakarta, Surabaya, or Bandung, they know exactly how to rejoice the day. It’s a love time! They will be busy choosing the right gifts for their beloved; the red roses? The heart shaped-chocolate? Or the beautifully carved pink V-Day card inserted in a bouquet. Oh yeah… love birds are in every corner of Jakarta on this 14th of Feb.


However, it's rather silly to hold V-Day celebration responsible for the badly decline on the morals of the young generation today as accused by some religious hardliners. The root cause is much deeper that such festivity ranging from the bad side effects of globalisation, modernization, etc. So long, it is not adressed properly, the decline will be worsening over times. You can't just curb any personal preference or ban someone to do something that is not against the law. I think it's wiser to instill religious values, ethics, and morality to our young generation so that they know what choices to make in life. Instead of putting them in 'a cage' by banning them from things we consider bring harms and damage, we should prepare, equip, and train them with sufficient 'ammunitions' to enable them fight their own battle and win :-).



Sometimes, I can’t help wondering whether they know the history of the Valentine Day they celebrate or not. I mean to memorialize something, you need to know the meaning or why it is deemed necessary to honor such a day. It should be something ingrained within our consciousness so that we can properly pay tribute to such occasion. It is not about following the trend, or just goes along the trend to stay up to date, and regarded as modern. If such is the case, then it will be easier for the huge sales of commercial companies to lay traps on you. You will end up buying things you don’t really require. Your spending will increase which means your savings will be less while the companies are growing fatter in their bellies because people like us feed them unconsciously. Back to V-Day, I don’t encourage people especially youngsters and teenagers to celebrate the day solely because it is deemed modern and up to date. It’s a matter of personal preference. It’s up to you to decide the good and the bad sides of any choice you take. Yet, I think it’s wise to ask yourselves before you take part in such festivity whether is it truly love you celebrate? Or are you just following the trend of the so called popular culture? Worse, are you just victims of the gigantic commercial sales ads to generate more money? If you don’t celebrate, you will be branded as old fashioned, out of date. To be modern, you have to absorb anything western in your life style. Well… I don’t think so. I mean not everything from the West is good and fit to our world. There are things we should follow and apply to our life. But, there are also things that is just enough for us to know but shouldn’t follow. What we need to do is exploit the good things of everything and leave behind the bad ones.


So, if you ask me what I think of V-Day, well, you know already my answer. It’s just out of place in my world. In addition, I think it’s a bit out of tune to celebrate an event having its origin still in question or a bit unclear. Isn’t every day is love? Lol … Instead of sharing the superficiality of the notion of spending one day in sharing affection with loved ones, why can’t we show our loved ones how much we care everyday?

On the Shores of the Broken

On the shores of the broken,
Let the winds of the heavens hold you dear,
Let the sunlight bathe you clear,
For in between ashes and flames,
I shall always stand near,



On the shores of the broken,
Let the sea wash the tears away,
Let the moon ease the pain,
For our song will burn brighter,
When the hand of Life contains our hearts,



On the shores of the broken,
Let not fears falter the spirits,
Let not doubts cloud the minds,
For in silence we shall battle our shadow of shame,
And I shall always stand close,



On the shores of the broken,
Let your bare feet take delights in the waters,
Let the soul take comforts in this silence and tranquility,
Let the eyes take pleasure of the bountiful nature,
And we shall await the Divine Grace

Winter Kiss

Frosty snow bites fiercely,
bringing chill to the bones,
as the wind wails an anguished cries,
and the trees bark in ferocious fury,
when winter brings her deadly kiss,
turning the land into waste of barren whiteness,


O, Wind, Winter has come mercilessly,
stealing away the Summer grass,
while Spring hides in quite abode,
and Autums slumbers in stilness,
as Winter lays her deadly kiss,


White and bare in coldness,
seagulls shriek the cliffs and hills,
Black wings flap and snap in pale skies,
the seas frozen in glistening tears,
as Winter lays her deadly kiss,



Yet, in beast, beauty emerges out of rage,
sculptures of nature in alluring shapes,
laid bare anywhere the eye beholds,
icicles hanging over trees, grass, and rooftops,
frozen tears of the skies painted the land,
it's such beauty in the beast

Lost in Winter

The sun is a shade of shadow in grayish skies,
The icy wind howls and shrieks,
The trees stood frozen in white,
Wintry wet sculptures hanging from rooftops,
And black wings flap against a pale morning,


The ice-covered land glistens in tears,
As snowflakes held her in frosty captive,
Cold and bitter with rage of winter,
Sank deep in the deep of despair,
A tender grief that turns into woe,

Such is where the souls languish with sadness,
In wintry evening shade and loneliness,
When the world is taken hostage in Hades,
To let solemn thoughts wander in agony,
seeking solace and peace,
Over the lost dream

One Biggest Fatal Mistake That Ruins Life

http://www.thejakartapost.com/news/2012/02/06/imos-article-one-fatal-mistake-ruins-your-life.html

Have you ever committed one big stupid mistake in your life that changes your life 180 degrees overnight? Have you ever wished you could turn back the hands of time to avoid such foolish reckless mistake? Well… I am certain most of you will say “Yeah…I did.” But I’m sure it’s not as horrendous as what film producer Afriyani Susanti had done. The public had condemned her with mockery, disdain, scorn and curses. The day after the horrific fatal accident last January 22 at Tugu Tani in Central Jakarta, she became most wanted public enemy. Drunk and high, she drove her Xenia car that tragically claimed nine innocent lives, and severely injured three others. Her car smashed into a number of pedestrians in Tugu Tani as she could not control her speeding vehicle in such a state. Now, she has to face murder charges after the police beforehand accused her of having violated the Traffic Law for driving under the influence of narcotics and without a driver’s license. It was an accident, and I believe taking nine innocent lives was not even present in her wildest imagination. Her biggest fatal error was driving the car while she was under the influence of alcohol and drugs which she could have avoided if she only used her common sense. It was her choice in the first place to join the party, taking the alcohol, swallowing the drugs, and got into that driver’s seat. She took all those choices, thus she was in full responsibility of her action, albeit the fact that it was a tragic accident. I feel sorry for her but I feel most sorry for the victims and their families.

Lesson learned from this incident is no matter how much peculiar your lifestyle might be, you have to make sure that your action does not bring harms to others. Yeah… I don’t have any objection people enjoying parties, having a little drink, taking a little sip of drugs as long as they don’t bring any harm to others… as long as they maintain their decency in public. It’s their life and we have no control over their morality. We know such lifestyle will bring only damages to their life, and over time they will come to their senses if they are smart enough. Reserved that lifestyle to yourselves, and if you are high and drunk, please have a common sense to hail a cab to take you home, instead of driving in such wretched circumstances. Drinking and taking drugs is stupid enough. While driving under the influence of those dangerous substances is just crazy and totally irresponsible. Don’t ever put others in grave dangers for your silly mischief.

It’s heartbreaking to see the families of the victims wailed and mourned for their lost loved ones. Their beloved have been snatched away in such cruel way by a reckless and an irresponsible driver. It’s also heartbreaking to see Afriyani’s mother begged for forgiveness in tears last night in TV One to the families. Not to mention the shame she would bear in witnessing the public mock and scorn her daughter. A Photo of her daughter has even edited and pasted as a joke. The day after the incident, I received email on such photo with tagline “if you want to commit a mass suicide, just call me..bla..bla…bla…something like that.” It was a silly joke. It was after all a tragic accident which could have avoided if only Afriyani had been sober. Alcohol and drug kill!!! They Destroy lives!!!


Anyhow, no one can turn back the time. No matter how much Afriyani wanted to rewind the clock, it would fail. Now, she has to to live with the fact that she allegedly killed nine people. She has to pay the consequences of her choices. For her, it is her biggest fatal mistake that ruins not only her life but also others'

A Summer Kiss

A summer kiss steals winter away,

Icicles slowly melt in tears,

As the sun blows his kisses,

Flowers and trees meet his gaze in sweetest smiles,



A summer kiss bids winter farewell,

To unlock nature of its frozen secrets,

When snow white disperse in haste,

And birds fly again in blue skies,



A summer kiss hides winter away,

Nature awakes from her slumber,

As her limbs vibrate once more with life,

And the world is full in colors,

The Fall of the Giants

Everyone is just kind of holding their breath to view the fall of the giants in Europe. Starting from the crumbling of Greek Pantheon, European countries are dragged along into the crisis as if the Greek Gods had left and shattered The Olympus, lol. Italy, once the birth place of the Great Roman Empire, has suffered the lingering crisis as well. Such dire situation has forced Italia Prime Minister, Silvio Berlusconi to resign after austerity budget had been passed. It is as if we witness history repeats itself, the clock of times being rewind back at the era when Greece and Roman Empire reached glorious momentum, then crumbled . Both leaders and citizens alike in European nations must brace themselves for an extreme long economic winter.


The lingering European debt crisis is worsening European Nations (EU) grapple with a massive sovereign debt crisis which bring worst economic winter. Last week, Standard & Poor’s (S & P) had mass downgraded nine euro zone countries like shaky borrowers such as Italy and Spain credit ratings which instantly sparked renewed fears over global market. S & P further stripped off France of its once-sterling AAA debt rating into AA. The lost over France had forced the credit ratings agency to cut European Financial Stability Facility (EFSF) to AA+ from AAA on Monday, plunging the European market into a fresh crisis. The agency argued that its actions on euro zone ratings were “primarily driven by insufficient policy measures by EU leaders to fully address systemic stresses”. Meanwhile, the United States is still struggling to recover from its financial crisis since 2008. The rate of unemployment remains stubbornly high and cut spending is on the rise to battle the enormous deficit. The global market now fears that the gloom over Europe would soon turn into doom. Combined with the sluggish economic development in US, this recently situation has roiled the global market by fears of new setbacks, defaults and the possibility of a double-dip recession. It may seem that the giants start to fall one after another.
Anxiety is building over the fate of Euro currency backed by the European Union (EU). It is the symbol of unity of the EU countries. Now, the solidity of EU is put on a test. In order to work properly, the struggling EU countries have to overcome their differences on proposals and formulas to cure the crisis. They have to work hard to correct differences in the underlying economies (i.e labour migration, nominal wage adjustments, price adjustments). In addition, they should establish mechanisms to ensure that imbalances are promptly corrected. It takes extra efforts to draw such consensus while each is trying to save its own skin. It is a financial as well as political issue. The road to recovery will be bumpy and rough. The global financial players are in wait and see position.


While US and Europe are still struggling to overcome the financial crisis, political turmoil is brewing in the Middle East Countries that once overpower Europe during the glory of the Ummayad and Abassid caliphate. The unrest is triggered by the rampant injustices, poverty and deteriorating economic life, and the repression for freedom of speech by dictatorship over the countries for generations. Tunisia is the country which brought the dictatorship, President Ben Ali, down and this victory has been causing a domino effect far reaching across the Middle East in which the legacy of U.S.-dominated governments across the region resided. The U.S. empire’s reach in the resource-rich and strategically vital Middle East has been shaken to its core as one by one the Giants fall. Will these countries be able to regain its sovereignty and seize an increasing role in the world? Well… the road into such stability and glory is still far ahead with all its long winding bumpy steps.


Meanwhile, Indonesia has scored a perfect point after Fitch had upgraded its sovereign credit rating to put Indonesia back on line among countries having the investment grade level last December, and followed by Moody this January after almost fourteen years of degradation since 1997/1998 economic crisis. Amidst global economic and financial uncertainty, this achievement is something we all cherish. It is recognition of the success of Indonesia to maintain its macroeconomic stability. The inflation rate is successfully curbed and the economic growth remains high. With these positive economic outlook, Indonesia might become a glistening jewel in Asia for investors who seek stable economic environment.


Yet, challenges ahead remain hefty especially how the government keeps maintaining close coordination with Bank Indonesia and other elements to safeguard the macroeconomic stability and how Bank Indonesia maintains to keep executing its right decision within the right time. Further, the government has to tackle the lack of infrastructure and rampant corruption. The government cannot afford to relax and remain alert at all times. It has taken much effort and many years to climb into this investment grade level but it will take only a few mistakes or bad decisions to undo the progress.

Sinetron and Infotainment: A Vicious Circle

It is not until I subscribed to cable TV, then I realize how bad our national TV programs had become since the mushrooming of screen sinetrons (TV soap opera series) and celebrity gossip shows. I remember when I was a kid; there was only one national TV which regularly aired programs such as Si Unyil, Jendela Rumah Kita, and ACI (Aku Cinta Indonesia). I was a big fan of those series. Many valuable lessons learned in those programs among others the values of family, tolerance, respect, honesty, and honor. It was in such stories as Mickey Mouse, Donald Duck, Flash Gordon, and Hulk among others; my special interest in English grew. I used to go with my childhood friends to a neighbor a few blocks away who owned a black and white TV, waiting in line for our favorite series. We huddled together in a crowded living room, watching with mouth wide open as the characters came to life, lol. It was funJ. We had witnessed the magic of electricity and the little black square box touched our life. Yeah, back in 1980s, electricity and TV was a luxury we did not enjoy until a few more years ahead. When the sun went down, I saw my father set on our oil lamps which function as our source of light during the nightJ. Often, I laughed when my sister’s face smeared with black soot after study . It’s no wonder, the neighboring kids and I, were willing to go on foot a few kilometers away to see the wonder of the TV. I remember back then how fascinated I got hearing the characters spoke in strange accent and language I’ve never heard before. There was not yet any regulation required foreign film series to be dubbed in Indonesia so seeing those films has helped me to cultivate my English. Bit by bit my vocabulary grew. Afterward, internet gained access to my campus around 1999. I perched on a stool in one corner of net cafe around the campus, trying to greet the wonder of such technology for the first time, digging up some references for my thesis. Then, I found myself buried under words of strange language. It hit me in the head that to be able to reap the vast knowledge in these intricate webs of net connection, you have to understand the language. The one thing our national TV lacked during that era was the freedom of expression and speech in digging facts in news. The ruling government has enforced a strict and rigid control over the news programs. Medias were overshadowed by censorship and threat of banning if they gave offends to the government. Medias should serve as a tool for the government to deliver its propaganda.

After the reformation era in 1998 when people’s power toppled down the ruling regime, Medias regain their freedom of speech in Indonesia. Private TVs and printed Medias proliferate like mushroom during rainy season. It is not surprising that in this digital and information era, Medias play significant role in bringing changes. It furthers play role in forming and reshaping public opinion. Recent unrest in Middle East is started from the Facebook in which freedom of speech is not yet curbed by the Tunisian Government. One ordinary man with social media has ignited a Revolution which set the Middle East on fire. In Indonesia, the Medias have mainly helped the public to put pressure on the government on sensitive issues such corruption, human rights violation, and public policies. They help people to control and watch over the ruling bodies. However, Medias has two faces, two sides of a coin. Since the mushrooming of private TVs, I hardly watch anything else on TV screens, except for the news. Often, I found myself in frustration trying to find one good TV series which is as good as the old ones. Zapping through the channels, I always end up in annoyance to see sinetrons with a lot of drama, crying, yelling and ridiculously over-the-top storylines. It’s just too much. The kids also had no better option than watching such a show during prime time. As a result, many improper words, behaviors, and other unacceptable bantering has poisoned the mind of the kids because the parents let them watch sinetrons…because most sinetrons are made for commercial purposes… to obtain maximal profit and rating…the moral obligation to educate the public comes second. Sinetron having kids as heroes does not mean it is suitable for children consumption. Foreign kids TV series are dubbed in Indonesia such as Sponge Bob, Disney series, Barbie, etc. which is a pity as children will have less encouragement to develop their reading skills through such screens. When I was a kid, I used to listen to dialogues, watch the screens while reading the running text. It helps a lot to stimulate my skills in writing and reading. I get the fun as well as the learning process. But now, those TV series are packed like a ‘fast food’, which means “kids are not required to put extra efforts to get the pleasure of watching the films.” It’s all about bringing all the fun without much exercise. I mean, where’s the fun in it???

What’s even sadder is the abundance of gossip talks which seem to have infected almost every channel except for the two news channels (Thanks God, there’s still these two). Alas, then again, people just love such infotainment tittle-tattle. Often, I overhear some women discussing certain gossips of some celebrities on train, lol. It’s a bit annoying. There might be several reasons why so many people seem to enjoy such shows. Through such infotainment news, people have the opportunity to take a glimpse into the lives of their favorite celebrities. Possibly, people get the feeling of some kind of odd satisfaction when they know the life of their idols are just like theirs, imperfect, and may be messy. It’s good to know that their life is certainly not as bad as the ones on screen. Their hunger for news about celebrities and details on how they lead their lives seems insatiable. And the Medias are just too clever to take full advantage of such situation. “Gossip sells faster like raging fire”. It creates lots of money. Then, it’s like a vicious circle. It’s hard to cut off the line.. it’s feeding on each other. At least, now I have another option to watch my TV screen without much distress. Now, when my nephew comes to my home, I can offer him better series to watch. He can enjoy the films while learning to understand the language.